LHC Fires Hadrons – Morning Continues

N/A Well, it is now pretty much official. The Large Hadron Collider at CERN was switched on about three hours ago (8:30 AM UK time) and contrary to some initial reports (mainly on Fox News), the world did NOT end.

Let me repeat that..The world HAS NOT actually ended. However, we are getting some indications that feelings of intellectual pointlessness, dramatic ennui and general emotive disassociation have slightly increased in parts of rural Switzerland. Hopefully we will get some film of that soon.

Of course, the enormous research collider which was feared (or hoped) by some to create a giant black hole at the center of our planet causing all existence as we know it to wink out hasn’t actually created any collisions yet (that will take place in a month), but hadron particles are now in motion around the 17 mile device…so that’s a good sign then isn’t it.

Of course, according to quantum physics, time distorts as you come into a black hole where your perception may be of everything being perfectly normal even though an outside observer (like Fox News, for instance) may be watching you torn atom by atom and compacted down into nothingness in real time. So the world MAY actually have ended a couple hours ago, and we just don’t know it yet.

I love science.

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3 Comments

  1. its not very far from me, so I guess I’ll let you know if the world ends here first :)

  2. 1) Hey – you got protons in my magnetic fields!
    2) Well YOU got magnetic fields all over my protons!

    together) two great tastes that taste great together!

    (Apologies for this stale pop-culture reference … but I’d already used my other easy reference, the song “Supercollider”, earlier today when I heard the news.)

    I love science, too!

  3. Me, I’m looking forward to finding out if there is a proven sighting of a Higgs boson particle. It will actually be even more entertaining if they don’t prove it out–because then we get to develop other theories as to why gravity works.

    Non-Newtonian physics, ho!


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