Bronte-saurus (aka When Irish Eyes…)


There are few occasions in our fair Caledon which engenders as much general merriment as does the opening of a new Sim. One such occasion recently passed, as we gathered to welcome our new neighbors in Caledon Eyre.

A fine turnout was on hand to paruse the new, rugged landscape and greet several newcomers to Our Obstinate Homeland. Indeed, I can state that it has been some time since I had such a pleasant time simply visiting with my countrymen as I did that day.

Hosted in part by the Caledon Civic Society and the Imperial Navy of Caledon, a handsome board was provided by the popular watering hole and dockside dive in Kittywickshire, The Salty Mermaid, with a fine vintage of Shiraz Red the beverage of choice for many. The fete was held on the grounds of Mr. Jules Whittlesea’s estate, at times wandering through Miss Tombola’s most excellent livery.

In addition to excellent conversation and wines, Miss Lightfoot and Dr. Sputnik (and no doubt others I am not aware of) put together a most interesting looking Landmark Scavenger hunt to help people get to know Eyre better. I do not know who won the 1000L prize however, being too engrossed in the wine and conversation, a general sense of ennui and vicious lag to move that much.

For me, the entertainment had three highlights. The first of which was a chance to escort my lovely young sister-in-law, Miss kiralette Kelley. The second highlight was the unveiling of an absolutely stunning pen and ink portrait of said young lady by Mr. Griffin Hax, a resident of Eyre. So impressed was I with his eye and artistry that it is my intention to commission him to paint the official portraiture of the Barony for the year.

Lastly, Miss Kelley and I enjoyed a thrilling Hansom ride in one of Miss Tombola’s newest creations, driven by her stable urchin, Master Oliver Grut. All in all, a fortuitously orphaned rapscallion whose skill, breakneck speed and total lack of moral nuance resulted in nearly running down six Caledonians and viciously trampling a rabbit who failed to signal upon turning left, resulting in 213 more “spiteful deeds” points for me towards this year’s Nefarious Baron Convention to be held in Brighton this Autumn. A few more such outings I will take a clear lead in the point totals and become odds on favorite to win this year’s Ludvig Bomburst Memorial Trophy. Huzzah!

All of those in attendance I am sure would join me an expression of gratitude to all of those who helped plan and execute this excellent event, and indeed to welcome beautiful Eyre to our blessed commune.


The crowd (above) on the Whittlesea Estate.


Miss Edwina Heron (above)


Prof. Alfonso Avalanche (above), pursuing his hobby.


Miss Kandace Commons (above), quite appropriately a Green faerie.


Dr. Rafael Fabre (above).


Miss Virrginia Tombola (above).


Mr. AliKuban Koba (above) and friend (and a parrot)


Miss Pia Loon (above)


Caledon’s once and future Timelord, Dr. Oolon Sputnik (above)


The enigmatic Miss Terry Lightfoot (above).


Mr. EllisDee Welinder (above).


Miss Kelley and myself (above), being driven hard and put away wet by Master Grut.


Yours truly admiring Mr. Hax’s portrait of kiralette (above)



  1. My goodness. How Professor Sputnik has changed…

    And that’s a lovely portrait of Miss Kiralette, in truth.

  2. I know that I certainly had a wonderful time in Eyre yesterday (despite the horrible lag and the crashes that accompanied it) and enjoyed doing the hunt with Lady Heron. It was nice to see so many fellow Caledonians at one time.

    What a beautiful portrait!

  3. Thank you so much for attending, Lord B. Your and your lady’s prescence always bestows a great sense of charm and fun to any event. I was pleased to see so many Caledonians make the journey to the Northern Reaches of our land.

    I should point out though distinctly green and rolling like the fair Isle Eire, is actually named after Miss Jane Eyre of the eponymous novel. Thus, “Rochester Street” where I reside :) Dark and brooding fellows are always welcome, though I don’t *believe* any of them conceal madwomen in their attics!

    Wonderful pictures–you somehow managed to capture everyone’s personality precisely; I might say I look a bit more the sophisticate than I truly am (caught being vain and leaving my glasses off–lucky I didn’t run into anyone). Have you a gallery in Caledon?

  4. Thank you for that piece of information, Miss Tombola. I have changed the title of the report accordingly.

    As for dark brooding men with madwomen in the attic, I remind you that I released the madwoman several weeks ago. Poor Clarissa is STILL trying to get the scent of sausage out of the restraints.

    I appreciate your kind words over my amateur attempts with a Brownie. I certainly have no gallery, but have amassed quite a collection of portraits of Caledonian personalities. Perhaps if space and an excuse (not to mention public desire) could be had, a temporary exhibit might be interesting.

  5. From everything I heard, it appears I missed a most wonderful party. And the portrait is simply stunning! I must commision Mr. Hax for a portrait of me.

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